les marteaux 7:44 Sat Aug 30
New Limerick Thread
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Same as before
The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
Helmut Shown
12:47 Fri May 17
Re: New Limerick Thread
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School lunch time we went and bought fags, And talked of poofs, johnies, jam rags Gaining sexual proficiency Reading Health & Efficiency Before there were top shelf mags
Two Geordie girls took off their tops They had nipples like organ stops
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arsene york-hunt
7:28 Thu May 16
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A bird from Essex had piss-flaps That snaped on a cock like bear traps, Not washing and such, Caused an unmoist crutch, So now they are covered with chaps.
School lunch time we went and bought fags, And talked of poofs, johnies, jam rags
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Hello Mrs. Jones
5:55 Thu May 16
Re: New Limerick Thread
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The was a bloke from Montreal, Who sat around doing fuck all The bored stiff Canuck Just didnt give a fuck So he just sat and stared at the wall
A bird from Essex had piss-flaps That snaped on a cock like bear traps
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arsene york-hunt
1:25 Thu May 16
Re: New Limerick Thread
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On a beach he decided to sit But was hit by some seagull shit The bloke next to him, His old Uncle Jim, Was hit by some poop from a tit.
The was a bloke from Montreal, Who sat around doing fuck all.
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Helmut Shown
1:12 Thu May 16
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Our usual transfer window is grim Perhaps it’ll be better with Tim Sully will cheer With Brady in his ear Just shows the power of the quim
On a beach he decided to sit But was hit by some seagull shit
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Hello Mrs. Jones
10:50 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Sullivan walks into a charity shop As he can't sell his clothes on Depop They said his Russian hat Looked like a dead cat The whole exercise was a flop
Our usual transfer window is grim Perhaps it’ll be better with Tim
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Alwaysaniron
8:09 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Now we can't tell the kids about sex And some of our posters (well, one, actually) that will vex So go get the kids toys dolls for girls, Dinosaurs for the boys then let Babie get fucked by T-Rex
Sullivan walks into a charity shop As he can't sell his clothes on Depop
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Mike Oxsaw
6:44 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A strange bloke I knew called Paul Fell in love with his 60s Vauxhall. Balls deep up it's pipe, Then his knob he would wipe, On the windscreen...and sadly that's all.
Now we can't tell the kids about sex And some of our posters (well, one, actually) that will vex
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Hello Mrs. Jones
5:51 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A transvestite geezer called Mick In the ladies washing his dick. The size of his schlong He pulled from his thong Was the size of a fucking breadstick
A strange bloke I knew called Paul Fell in love with his 60s Vauxhall
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arsene york-hunt
3:09 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Are we facing a footballing dawn? Or will Lopetegui face more scorn? Will we reach a great height, Or the usual old shite, And after bad form will be gorn.
A transvestite geezer called Mick In the ladies washing his dick.
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Helmut Shown
2:23 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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So Arsenal's fates in our hands which is nice They're asking for payback for them buying Rice 'afore Moyes mounts his bike They can wish all they like we'll be 3-0 down in a trice
Are we facing a footballing dawn? Or will Lopetegui face more scorn?
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Alwaysaniron
12:08 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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The punters you get at the Lane, Their chants and songs are so inane. But they've reached a new low With their latest poor show Doing the Poznan is fucking insane
So Arsenals fates in our hands which is nice They're asking for payback for them buying Rice
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Alwaysaniron
12:05 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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The punters you get at the Lane, Their chants and songs are so inane. But they've reached a new low With their latest poor show Doing the Poznan is fucking insane
So Arsenals fate is our hands which is nice They asking for payback for them buying Rice
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Alwaysaniron
11:56 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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The football we play to be blunt Is to most West Ham fans an affront We rarely create When we do it's too late Attack from the start you dinosaur cunt!
Now it's Moyes's last game which is nice And by winning we'd surely please Rice
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arsene york-hunt
3:33 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Now, Jimmy, from just down the lane, Was a right little scrote - total pain. This fuck-witted fool, Likes exposing his tool, Now's sectioned 'cause he is insane.
The punters you get at the Lane, Their chants and songs are so inane.
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Mike Oxsaw
2:49 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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This well-endowed bird from Bude Liked to go out in the nude. Her minge hair got caught In some shopping she'd bought Which somewhat did darken her mood.
Now, Jimmy, from just down the lane, Was a right little scrote - total pain.
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Hello Mrs. Jones
2:36 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A smart city banker called Kit Fell over after slipping on shit It came from a beagle Which caused the spreadeagle and made him look a right tit
This well-endowed bird from Bude Liked to go out in the nude
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Helmut Shown
1:29 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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I once met a really weird bloke Who thought comedy should be woke. David Badiel? Him of the front wheel? His comedy just ain't worth a poke
A smart city banker called Kit Fell over after slipping on shit
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arsene york-hunt
12:04 Wed May 15
Re: New Limerick Thread
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When this mortal coil you depart It s said that the dead still can fart Done at one's leisure, Your one final pleasure, Then off to hell in a handcart.
I once met a really weird bloke Who thought comedy should be woke.
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Helmut Shown
10:39 Tue May 14
Re: New Limerick Thread
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There was a man from Winnipeg Whose knob hung halfway down his leg It was tied with a strap Just above his kneecap Very sore when you kneel down and beg
When this mortal coil you depart It s said that the dead still can fart
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arsene york-hunt
1:04 Tue May 14
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Her regular trips to the gym Did result in a most sweaty quim She scrubbed the thing well, To get rid of the smell, Using Fairy Liquid and Vim.
There was a man from Winnipeg Whose knob hung halfway down his leg
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